Blogging for Suicide Prevention

Today is World Suicide Prevention Day, and this year's theme is “Stigma: A Major Barrier for Suicide Prevention.” I have been thinking about this for about a while and really wanting to take some time to write out my thoughts and share them in a semi-public way. I feel like suicide and self-destructive behaviors are very important things to be able to talk about, and it can be so incredibly hard to speak out. And I know that some days it can feel like hiding struggles and staying quiet are the only choice. I want to be honest and talk about hard things, but some of the consequences that come with speaking are unbearable.

People don't look at someone with mental disorders the same way they would if they had some other medical issue; like a heart condition, cancer, or diabetes. The reaction I see when people speak of mental illnesses seems to be fear. Fear for their safety? Fear for others? Fear of the unknown?

There is a lot of ignorance in the world . . .
And that is where stigma is the strongest, in ignorance.

It is easy to judge something you do not know, something you do not understand. Not many people realize that someone dies by suicide every 40 seconds. Not many people feel safe talking about suicide; and the worst part is, not many people feel that they can ask for help.

I have come very close to committing suicide more times than I'd like to admit. There have been periods of my life where everyday was darkened by the ever present cloud of suicidal thinking. The first time that I asked for help was a year ago, on September 11th, 2012. This last year that I have survived has been the most difficult and life changing year of my life.

We have to break the silence, I have to break the silence . . .
I want to help make my world a place that we feel safe to talk about hard things. This is me breaking the silence. I want to be a safe place.

I know that suicide prevention is possible, I know that it is possible to live through suicidal thoughts and self destructive patterns. I have, I do, and I'm sure I will again.

Today I am alive. I have survived.


Crystalinda Buebe
09-10-2013




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